Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Dad's Thoughts

I have been keeping a journal of the things that God lays on my heart. I don't really know why I started but I know that God will use my families trials to open their eyes to a God that is greater than we all realize.

This makes my heart break.
God is changing lives through this.
I want God to use Ethan but I want to take him home and hold him.

My daughter Helen has always loved to put money in the "Children's Miracle" coin collectors. They have many in the lobby of the Children's Hospital where Ethan lives. She loves to watch the money go round and round. I sometimes got frustrated at her because I didn't want to slow down to put any money in. You see Helen was doing something she loved to do and she had no
way of knowing that she was giving money to an organization that would be helping her little brother one day. God was using Helen. I am trying not to question God. I remember the story of the Israelites when they started to doubt God on the way to the promise land. God had them wander in the wilderness and they never got to see the promise land...I want to see the promise land. I am looking forward to holding my child. I have taken that for granted. He lies there very sensitive to touch, so we can barely touch him. When I can hold him in my arms I will weep and rejoice! I will never tell him I don't have time for him or Helen. I can only imagine the embrace of our heavenly Father and His Son when He got to heaven. My testimony will never be the same. My faith will never be the same. My weak witness will never be the same. My weak walk will never be the same. I challenge any man that is not in love with the Lord and raising his family according to the Holy Word to start now. Pray right now and tell God that you are a sinner and invite Him into your heart claim His death on the cross and it's forgiving healing power. You see you may live for a long time and have plenty of time to live for Jesus but someone in your family may not. By not telling them about Christ and living as an example you are putting them in danger. You are helping Satan drag them to Hell. Give every piece of your life to Christ and your family will follow you and respect you. He has given me strength when I needed it and let me cry like a child when I didn't. But my pastor reminded me that God saves up our tears...they are precious treasures to Him. God hears our prayers. I am learning so much about praying. I am learning how to pray specifically. Please let me know if you need prayer right now and my wife and I will pray for you because we desire the Lords strength and grace to with anyone struggling or hurting. Please join us in praying for Tyler he is 8 and has severe kidney problems...continue to lift up JR, Rudy and Kimberly. We have had very specific prayers answered in the last 24hrs...Praise the Lord. Hebrews 4:16 " Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need." As I get ready to go to sleep my wife and I cry and laugh at the comments on this blog. Everyone wants to help and we want you to know that you can help by making sure that you know the Lord Jesus as your personal Savior. And if He is, then lead your family boldly in His word.
We love you Kerry & Bonnie,


  1. God has His reasons Kerry and Bonnie and it seems He is showing you a purpose. He was faithful to us when Kristi got sick and changed all of us in the same way. Somehow it brings to light the urgency to reach others for Him. We too have seen Him in a different way and understand that we are here for a purpose, His purpose. We will never forget as a family what He took us through and how He brought us out. We are all better for it and continue to praise Him daily for His love,presence and sacrifice for us. He is able and loves us all with such a love that we never could love one another. He loves our children more than we ever could and wishes only His best for them. God has taught us all how precious life is and how quickly it can change but at the same time, He is in total control and sees the whole picture where we only see the moment. One day we can ask Him all the questions but then I don't think it will matter! I'm so glad to hear that precious little Helen gets to come visit. It seemed to help Conor and Carson just to see their mom. It was hard on them but even in that God was so faithful. We knew He cared and He helped those two precious little boys that almost lost their mommy, that they were so close to, walk through a situation that they never asked for. They did so good even though their little lives were turned upside down for two weeks. I remember my precious little Carson banging his fist on his legs wanting his mommy and daddy and wanting to go home. It tore my heart out because at that point she was so critical and had such a long way to go. Hang on. He has been so faithful and we are so excited over the progress! We are continuing to pray!
    We love you all so very much and I praise His Holy name to see the way He has enlightened you to His plans and pursposes for others in using us. It is amazing to sit back and think of how He tears your heart out, turns your world upside down but at the same time causes us to trust Him so much more than ever before and gives that perfect peace that passes all understanding. I still, to this day cannot explain the peace He gave the Sunday we got the call.
    I guarantee you will never be the same again but then I don't think He wants us to be!
    Love you

  2. I am so sorry that you all are going through this and your strength amazes me! Please know that I am thinking about Little Ethan, both of you and little Helen and praying constantly!

    With Love, Heather

  3. Kerry,
    Thank you so much for sharing your heart and thoughts.
    We love you guys!

  4. You guys are amazing. What a testimony you now have to share with Helen and Ethan one day. How lucky they are to have you both. I am thinking of you all and praying for Ethan's recovery each step of the way.

  5. Kerry and Bonnie,

    We love you guys. We are thinking of and praying for Ethan often, and checking in on you guys through your blog. I'm so glad Ethan is making progress. You will be holding him in your arms before you know it. He is such a precious, adorable baby. Must get that from Bonnie;0) Love y'all!!

    Christy Smith

  6. Kerry, the more you write the more I am thinking you may have missed your calling...

  7. Kerry and Bonnie

    Everytime I read what you guys have wrote I am ministered to. Keep trusting in him and stay strong. We love you and are praying for all of you.

    Heather Robertson

  8. Bonnie and Kerry,
    I received a link to your blg from Amber. First, let me say what a PRECIOUS family you have. It has been so long since I've seen you guys!
    Little Ethan is an angel and I have been so touched by reading your blog. I have prayed for him, you guys, and his doctors/nurses daily. I truly believe that the Lord has a plan and I'm trusting for complete healing for little Ethan. Praise God for his progress!!
    In my thoughts..
    Emily (McLelland)

  9. Bonnie & Kerry,

    What a testimony you guys have, and little Ethan will have!! Reading your posts have been a blessing. Know that you all are in our constant thoughts and prayers. We pray that God will heal Ethan's body and y'all will be able to bring him home soon.

    God bless your precious family!


  10. I received the website to your blog from Jessica, a member of your church. Reading your blogs have been such a blessing for me. Not only is God using Ethan, he is using both of you as well. I just wanted ya'll to know that all of Hartford Baptist Church in Hartford, AL are now praying fervently for your family. God Bless all of you! Stay strong in the Lord and you will be blessed!

  11. Kerry and Bonnie,

    I got your link off of someones FB page and curiosity kick in. I began to read and read and cry and cry. Your testimony is laying VERY STRONG ON MY HEART! So much that usually when someone asks for prayer I say a prayer and carry on with my life. You see, I dont even know you and for some reason I keep coming back looking at your updates, crying, praying.... not much brings me to my knees but you all have!! What a blessing you have been to me, and you dont know me. Wow, there are people I am around everyday that dont impact me like you both have. I will continue to follow your story and I know we will meet one day!!! Thank you Again.....Amber Carter